The Call to Listen in a Divided World (Charlie Kirk's Death)

Let's turn to James 1:19 KJV and read, "Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath."

Last week our nation witnessed another tragedy that reminds us how far we've strayed from communication and community. Charlie Kirk, a 31-year-old father of two young children, was killed while speaking at a college campus. Now, you might not have agreed with everything Kirk said or stood for – and that's okay. But what happened at Utah Valley University wasn't okay. A man's life was taken. Children lost their father. A wife lost her husband. Turn to Acts 17.

As believers, we can grieve this loss while learning from it. Now, there's a recent article from The Way titled "The Listening Leader." It reminds us that listening is a crucial tool in a leader's skill set – and we're all leaders in some capacity, whether in our homes, workplaces, or communities. We'll be referring to this article here.

The Battle of Ideas vs. The Battle of Violence

In our democratic society, we're supposed to have what's called "the battle of ideas." This is where different viewpoints clash through debate, discussion, and dialogue – not through violence. The apostle Paul himself engaged in this kind of discourse. In Acts 17:17 KJV, we read: "Therefore disputed he in the synagogue with the Jews, and with the devout persons, and in the market daily with them that met with him."

Paul didn't agree with everyone, but he engaged with words, not weapons. He listened to understand their positions before teaching the gospel. Turn to Proverbs 18.

As the The Way article mentions, there are two ways of listening: with understanding and without understanding. Too often today, we listen without understanding – we're just waiting for our turn to attack rather than truly hearing what's being said.

When We Stop Listening, We Stop Learning

Proverbs 18:2 warns us: "A fool hath no delight in understanding, but that his heart may discover itself." When we refuse to listen to those who disagree with us, we become fools. We miss opportunities to sharpen our own understanding, to find common ground, or to respectfully articulate why we believe what we believe.

The tragedy at Utah Valley University happened because someone chose violence over dialogue. They chose to silence a voice rather than engage with it or simply walk away. This is the ultimate failure of listening – when we become so convinced that the other person has nothing worth hearing that we believe they have no right to speak at all. Turn to Proverbs 20.

Jesus: The Master Listener

Jesus was a master listener. And he asked questions not because He didn't know the answers, but because He wanted to engage people's hearts and minds. Let me share three powerful examples:

First, in Luke 18:41, Jesus asked the blind man: "What wilt thou that I shall do unto thee?" Now, it was obvious the man was blind and needed healing, but Jesus still asked. He gave the man dignity by letting him voice his need.

Second, in Mark 9:21, when a father brought his possessed son to Jesus, He asked: "How long is it ago since this came unto him?" Jesus wanted to understand the full scope of this family's suffering. He listened to their story before bringing healing.

Third, in John 9:35, after healing the blind man at the pool of Siloam, Jesus later found him and asked: "Dost thou believe on the Son of God?" This wasn't about physical healing anymore – Jesus was listening for the man's spiritual readiness.

In each case, Jesus shows us that listening creates space for understanding, healing, and transformation. Even when confronted by those who opposed Him, Jesus listened first. He heard their accusations, their doubts, their fears – and then He responded with truth and love.

Drawing Out Deep Waters

There's a powerful verse in Proverbs 20. Let's go to verse 5 and read together: "Counsel in the heart of man is like deep water; but a man of understanding will draw it out." Think about that image – the real issues, the real problems, the real beliefs people hold inside themselves are often buried deep like water in a well. It takes patience and skill to draw them out.

Careful questioning and genuine listening help us get to those deep waters. Last week's tragedy reminds us what happens when we stay on the surface, shouting at each other across the divide. We never get to the deep waters where real understanding can happen. We never discover what truly drives people, what hurts them, what they fear, or what they hope for.

Three Sides to Every Story

The Way article tells us that there are three sides to every story – the perspectives from each participant and a third one from a neutral vantage point. Too often in our divided world, we only hear one side. We listen to the news sources that agree with us. We talk to people who think like us. We dismiss the other side without ever truly hearing it.

When we're helping someone work through a conflict, or when we're in a conflict ourselves, we must remember this principle. There's what I think happened, what you think happened, and then there's what actually happened – which is often somewhere in between. Only by listening to all perspectives can we approach truth.

Our Response as Believers

So how do we respond to this tragedy as Christians?

First, we mourn. Romans 12:15 tells us to "weep with them that weep." We don't celebrate violence against anyone, regardless of their political views. Every life has value - period. That's not up for debate.

Second, we must model better discourse. In our homes, in churches, in schools, and our communities, we need to show that it's possible to disagree without being disagreeable. We need to demonstrate active listening – asking genuine questions, seeking to understand before being understood, and admitting when we don't know everything about a subject.

Third, we pray. We pray for Kirk's family – his wife and their kids. We pray for the shooter and his family, that God might work even in this darkness. We pray for justice and answers. We pray for our nation, that we might find ways to bridge that which seems to divide us through dialogue rather than deepen them through violence.

The Ministry of Listening

The article says that when people feel listened to, they feel "appreciated, valued, respected, accepted and loved." Think about that – simply by listening, we can communicate God's love to others. Conversely, when people are not listened to, they feel "disrespected, ignored, invisible, unloved, rejected, unworthy, and alone."

Is it any wonder that in a society where we've stopped listening to each other, we're seeing increased loneliness, violence, and division? When people feel unheard long enough, some resort to terrible actions to make themselves heard.

Practical Application

This week, I challenge each of us to practice intentional listening:

1. When someone shares a different viewpoint, ask a clarifying question before responding.

2. In family discussions, make sure everyone gets a chance to speak without interruption.

3. Seek out one person you typically disagree with and have a respectful conversation.

4. Pray before engaging in difficult discussions, asking God for wisdom and understanding.

5. Remember to look for all three sides of every story – draw out those deep waters.

A Father's Heart

Before we close, I want to share something personal. As a father myself, this tragedy hits differently. Charlie Kirk was just 31 years old with two young children who will now grow up without their dad. That breaks my heart.

You know, sometimes I get frustrated with my own kids. Maybe they're not meeting my expectations, or they're making choices I wouldn't make. But this tragedy reminds me of what really matters. My kids need me to listen to them – really listen. Not just wait for my turn to lecture or correct, but to hear their hearts, their struggles, their dreams.

I also have to trust that God's got my kids too. It's not all on me to make them wonderful people. My job is to stay connected, to keep those lines of communication open, and to model what it looks like to listen with love. Even when I disagree with them, even when they frustrate me, I need to remember that every day is precious. And in the end, what will matter the most is whether I took the time to truly talk to and listen them.

What We've Learned Today

So, let's summarize:

1. Listening is powerful – Jesus showed us that asking questions and truly hearing people opens doors.

2. Words matter more than winning – The battle of ideas should never become a battle of violence. We can disagree passionately while still treating each other with simple respect.

3. Everyone needs to be heard – When people feel unheard, they become desperate.

4. Deep waters require patience – The real issues are often buried deep. We need to be people of understanding who can draw out what's really in people's hearts.

5. Time is precious – Let's use the time we have in this life to build bridges, not walls.

Moving Forward

This week, let's honor the memory of those lost to senseless violence. Be the person who asks one more question before giving your opinion. Be the parent who puts down the phone and really listens to your child. Be the neighbor who can disagree without being disagreeable. Be the believer who shows the world that God's love can bridge any divide.

You have the power to change someone's day, maybe even their life, simply by listening. That's not weakness – that's the strength of God in Christ in you. Go out there and be listeners who lead with love. Your families need it, your communities need it, and our nation desperately needs it.

May God give us all ears to hear, hearts to understand, and wisdom to know when to speak and when to simply listen. The world is watching how we respond to tragedy and division. Let's show them there's a better way.

Amen?